why do you suck at juggling

I read this blog post this morning. Quoted below:

"This is an anecodote that I often think about. 
It comes up for me a few times a week, whenever I feel really dumb or inept. 
The story is about juggling but it is really about much more than juggling.

Before the Pandemic, I would practice juggling at a gym. There was a large room
with a high ceiling and a mirrored wall. 
It was a great spot to practice. Sometimes, I’d even film myself.

Often, when I was in, a fellow named Sebastian would drop off his two young sons there
while he went to lift weights and swim. 
The kids would goof around and build forts with foam mats. 
I would casually do my own thing and juggle. 
I was working on three ball stuff and mostly staying within my comfort zone. 
There were drops, but not a lot, and I definitely looked like a juggler.

When the Pandemic hit, I decided to push myself. 
I got interested in siteswaps and wanted to learn the five ball cascade.
I started practicing outside on the lawn outside my place.
One day, Sebastian walks by and asks: 
“Hey? Are you that juggling guy from the gym? 
Yeah, why do you suck at juggling now?”

This is so funny. Of course, I looked like I sucked at juggling.
There were so many drops. I spent more time bending over and chasing balls than I did juggling. 
And so, obviously, I sucked at juggling now. 
And yet, really, I was pushing my skill horizon harder than I had in years.
My juggling in the gym was well within my comfort zone. 
It looked easy, even effortless. The hard, skill-building, 
effortful juggling looked like it sucked."

It highlights the disparity between actually improving at something, and what that looks like to an outside observer.

Improving at a difficult skill is not a Rocky training montage.

It’s a slow, uncomfortable feeling. And after we’ve objectively improved, we still sometimes feel like we’ve regressed. It’s not until we are tested and have actual data that we accept we’ve improved.

Maybe this is just with certain skills, like knowledge work. I suspect getting better at a physical activity is easier to notice.

So go out there and make people think you suck at something.

"So, maybe, if you’re comfortable doing something. 
Consider pushing yourself onwards. 
Do another newer harder thing. 
It’ll look like you suck, there will be tonnes of drops, 
but you’ll be making progress."